Fatwa: # 21081
Category: Misc. Fiqh
Country: South Africa
Date: 5th June 2012

Title

My wife separated from me, what to do?

Question

My wife took my four year old son and separated from me about eighteen months ago. They moved to a different state. We’re not speaking to each other. In fact, she has filed for custody of our son. Where does my marriage stand?

 

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

 As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

 

We sympathize with you and realize that this must be a hard time for you. It is never easy for anybody to lose somebody close to them; let alone two people. We make dua that Allah guides you through this difficult time and that He does whatever is best for you and your family.

 

The most unfortunate thing about your situation is that there are no winners. Everybody involved has a lot to lose; most of all, your innocent child. He is forced to lose the warmth and compassion of one of his parents.

 

We do not know the reason why your wife split up with you and we also do not know who is to blame. All we can tell you is that for the sake of your child; if not for yourselves; you should try and reconcile your differences amicably. You should contact your wife, humble yourself and try to avoid going to court.

 

If you mutually decide not to get back together then so be it, but at least try to come to a mutual understanding with regards to the custody of your child and come to such an arrangement where your son is not deprived of any of his parents.

 

As for the current state of your marriage; it is still intact on condition that you have not issued a divorce.

 

We pray that Allah the Almighty help you through this difficult time and does whatever is best for yourself, your wife and your child. Aameen.

 

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

   

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

 

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