Fatwa: # 19620
Category: Marriage
Country: India
Date: 24th November 2011

Title

Is it permissible to look and speak to a one who is a prospective for marriage?

Question

My marriage has been fixed for next month. I still haven’t seen my fiancée. Daily I go to her house on her parent’s request. Is it permissible to speak and look at my fiancé?

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

You mention that you have not seen your fiancée. This could be in reference to you not seeing her face or not having interacted with her. If you refer to not seeing her face then this is something normally done before agreeing to marry;

Rasulullah salallāhu ῾alayhi wasallam said,

 

إِذَا خَطَبَ أَحَدُكُمُ الْمَرْأَةَ، فَإِنِ اسْتَطَاعَ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إِلَى مَا يَدْعُوهُ إِلَى نِكَاحِهَا فَلْيَفْعَلْ

“When one of you wishes to propose to a woman, if it is possible to see that which propels you to marry her (her beauty) then do so.” Abu Dawood

The commentators of Hadith mention that the purpose of looking is that some level of attraction is found in the potential spouse. It is permissible to see your potential spouse for this purpose.[1] In fact it is recommended that you go and see her in order to fulfill this of Sunnah of Nikah. Once you have done this you should refrain from seeing her until after marriage.

If you were referring to not interacting with her by your statement “I have not seen her”, this is not be permissible before marriage. Similarly speaking to her is also not permissible until after marriage.[2]

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mawlana Ali bin Cassim
Student Darul Iftaa
Los Angeles, CA (USA)

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.
www.daruliftaa.net


[1]مرقاة المفاتيح شرح مشكاة المصابيح (5/ 2053)

(عَنْ جَابِرٍ قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ إِذَا خَطَبَ أَحَدُكُمُ الْمَرْأَةَ) أَيْ أَرَادَ خِطْبَتَهَا وَهِيَ بِكَسْرِ التَّاءِ مُقَدِّمَاتُ الْكَلَامِ فِي أَمْرِ النِّكَاحِ عَلَى الْخُطْبَةِ بِالضَّمِّ وَهِيَ الْعُقَدُ (فَإِنِ اسْتَطَاعَ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إِلَى مَا) أَيْ عُضْوٍ (يَدْعُوهُ) أَيْ يَحْمَدُهُ وَيَبْعَثُهُ (إِلَى نِكَاحِهَا فَلْيَفْعَلْ) فَإِنَّهُ مَنْدُوبٌ

[2]وَقُلْ لِلْمُؤْمِنَاتِ يَغْضُضْنَ مِنْ أَبْصَارِهِنَّ وَيَحْفَظْنَ فُرُوجَهُنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ إِلَّا مَا ظَهَرَ مِنْهَا وَلْيَضْرِبْنَ بِخُمُرِهِنَّ عَلَى جُيُوبِهِنَّ وَلَا يُبْدِينَ زِينَتَهُنَّ.......... وَلَا يَضْرِبْنَ بِأَرْجُلِهِنَّ لِيُعْلَمَ مَا يُخْفِينَ مِنْ زِينَتِهِنَّ وَتُوبُوا إِلَى اللَّهِ جَمِيعًا أَيُّهَ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ }النور: 31{

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