Fatwa: # 17366
Category: Misc. Fiqh
Country: United States
Date: 1st December 2008

Title

Unanswered

Question

My fiance told me after 3 years of being engaged with him that he has a problem of masturbation and watching ****.

i haven't seen him in person in all of those years because he lives in a different country we only chat online and once in a blue moon talk on the phone.

He told me he has had the problem of masturbation since he was a teenager, and since he has been engaged with me he has really tired giving it up. He stops it for a couple weeks but it comes back.


the soonest we can get married is after three or 4 more years.....


the problem is that my fiance has opened up his sin to me
AND i dont know what to do

I have support him by sending him many religious articles and parts from Quran and tired makng his faith stronger but he is still going back
he has improved in prayers and in repentance

but the problem is that i dont know that if i stay with him and keep talking with him that he will start taking his sins easy because i am always trying to keep him happy and his hopes up
and i dont want him to be too open to me about his sins either cause we are just engaged and i don't want to break the boundaries between us
plus if he starts being more clear. sooner or later it will be no big deal to him to sin cause he will have no fear of being ashamed from me

and i also don't want him to hide his sins while i am still we are still talking and chatting often because he will get this habit of doing his sins and still keeping a relationship with me

i dont know if i should leave him for a temporary time or

stay with him and always support him. which makes his faith stronger and
always trying to keep him happy and his supports up because one reason he sins is because when he is stressful or sad

or
embarrass him and make him feel shameful so he repents to Allah and hides his sins from me when he goes back to them

Answer

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